Thursday, September 15, 2011

Journalism?

I've recently discoved that I have been having struggles writing in newpaper mode. I can write an essay just fine, but articles are not my forte.
For example:

Migrating Vending Machines
            As some of the more astute students of Timpview High School may have noticed, the Vending machines seem to have relocated over the summer, but we can’t be entirely sure until we get at least a few quality quotes from various sources verifying the fact that our beloved vending machines have indeed decided to move. When asked whether or not the vending machines actually moved, Katherine Moulton, Senior, 17, Red Hair, Book club president said “yes.” While this one person certainly believes that the vending machines are in a different place than last year, some of the freshmen don’t seem too sure.
            For clarification purposes, it has been verified that last year some of the vending machines were in the front lobby, but over the summer assistant principal Mr. White decided to move them  in order to change the lobby into a reception area.  Thus, the vending machines have migrated into the narrow hallway leading past the cafeteria into the industrial area of the school.
 Senior Heather Ivans says “I think it’s pointless to have them there. Nobody wants to go clear over there to get a snack.” However, Senior Mike Whitney disagrees, saying “It’s nice because they’re close to the gyms. You can just grab a snack when you’re hungry after working out.” When the second vending machine from the right was asked how it felt about its new home it gave the confusing response of “Deposit $1.25.” None of the other machines seemed to be of much help either, so I assume they’re happy.
One problem with their new location is that they seem to cause traffic jams in the miniscule hallway in which they are positioned. Between classes, people line up behind the vending machines to purchase their daily meal; this causes a roadblock of people to stretch across the hallway, making it take three times as long for students to get to their class, which already takes 6 and a half minutes to get to because it’s in the furthest corner of the industrial area, and this results in excessive tardies. Some students have even resorted to going around the school or parking on the driving range in order to be on time.
Overall, life at Timpview seems relatively unaffected by the change.

They call it a rough draft for a reason.

1 comment:

  1. You're brilliant. It made me laugh and you should totally publish it :)

    ReplyDelete